Jiu-Jitsu: It’s Not Just About Chokes and Sweeps (But There Are Plenty of Those Too!)
Let’s face it, BJJ can be a tough sport. Between the sweat, the scrambles, and the occasional tap out, it’s easy to forget that there’s a whole lot of fun to be had on the mats. That’s why we love these hilarious BJJ jokes! They capture the camaraderie, the challenges, and the sometimes-absurd situations we all encounter on our Jiu-Jitsu journeys.
So, buckle up, white belts, blue belts, purple belts, and beyond! We’re about to roll through 30 BJJ jokes that will have you laughing (and maybe wincing a little) in recognition. Get ready for some serious side-splitting action, because on these mats, laughter truly is the best medicine (except maybe for that armbar you just tapped to).
Our favorite Jiu-Jitsu Jokes:
- Q: What do you call a really good BJJ player who never taps? A: Unemployed.
- What’s the difference between a choke and a hug? A choke has a purpose.
- My BJJ instructor told me to focus on my weaknesses. So I started working on my social life.
- My BJJ coach keeps telling me to relax. But I can’t relax, there’s someone trying to strangle me!
- I went to the doctor and told him I hurt my back doing BJJ. He said, “Next time, try winning.”
- I bought a self-defense manual for BJJ. Turns out, it’s just a bunch of blank pages.
- My BJJ training is going well. I can now tie my gi blindfolded…while mounted.
- What’s the difference between BJJ and chess? Chess is easier to explain to your significant other.
- I love the feeling after a good BJJ class. Like I got hit by a truck…multiple times.
- My BJJ instructor says I have a lot of potential. Unfortunately, that potential seems to be for getting tapped out.
- What’s the difference between a BJJ black belt and a cup of coffee? The coffee eventually stops keeping you up at night.
- I finally learned how to escape a rear-naked choke. Now I just need to learn how to avoid getting put in one.
- I bought a BJJ rashguard that says “I tap when I want.” Turns out, that wasn’t very motivational.
- My BJJ coach told me to picture myself as a lion on the mats. Now everyone thinks I have rabies.
- I love BJJ because it’s a great way to meet new people. People who want to choke you unconscious.
- My BJJ training is like therapy, only way more expensive and with a higher chance of getting choked out.
- I finally learned how to shrimp out of mount. Now I just need to learn how to get there in the first place.
- BJJ is like a good book: I can’t put it down, even though it hurts.
- My BJJ instructor told me to focus on my breathing. So I started snoring during guard retention.
- I went to a BJJ competition and got disqualified for excessive tapping. Apparently, tapping 15 times in 30 seconds is considered “unsportsmanlike conduct.”
- What’s the best part about BJJ? The feeling of accomplishment when you finally tap someone out…with a legal move.
- My BJJ coach told me to visualize success. So I visualized myself winning a world championship. Then I woke up with a sore neck.
- I love BJJ because it’s a great way to learn self-defense. Now I can confidently tap out to anyone, anywhere.
- Why did the white belt cross the gym? To get to the blue belt side…and ask for help tying their gi.
ELIZABETHTOWN BJJ: YOUR STARTING POINT FOR BJJ TRAINING! ENROLL NOW!
Here at Elizabethtown Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, we welcome students of all ages and skill levels to join our vibrant community. Our experienced instructors are dedicated to providing top-notch training in a safe and supportive environment. Whether you’re a complete beginner or a seasoned veteran, we’re here to help you unleash your full potential on the mats.
So what are you waiting for? Take the first step towards a healthier, more empowered you and sign up for a BJJ class today. Your journey starts here.
